Story 22 // A Letter Too Late

She pulled out the letter from under her pillow. Finally, mail! She had been saving it for a while now, but couldn't wait any longer. Slowly, she opened the envelope and unfolded the note. The font was thick and bold, each word in all caps. It was written small, but that's how he always wrote. She tilted the page towards the hallway light, and started reading.

My Dearest Claire,

By now you know the ugly truth. I've been a fool to think I could keep it buried away from you. But I hope you know I was wrong in hiding it. I hope you can forgive me, even though I know you still have questions. I don't think I could of every answered your questions completely though. I don't know why I did it. I was driving to it as if possessed. But the reason doesn't matter now. Soon I will be whisked away from this place forever, but I will be connected to your soul. Do you feel the autumn wind on your face at sunset? That is me, gently kissing your checks as they turn rosy in the golden hues of the hour. Know that I have always loved you, and will forever follow you into eternity. 

All of my love, 

-Frederic

P.S. Please live your life and move on my sweet Claire. You have so much time in front of you, do not obsess over these recent events. Revenge will only bring you more pain. 

She put down the letter, tears in her eyes. She cried silently so as not to wake her cell mate. The sleeve of her prison shirt was coarse along her cheeks, as she wiped fat tears pouring out of her sea-glass green eyes.

Yes, she thought bitterly, revenge will bring on more pain.

Oh Hey There

Man, has this week been unusually busy, to say the least. Here's a recap of all the shenanigans I've been up to:


-Washed all my whites with a red shirt, so now I have a whole lot of pink tops. Awesome (NOT REALLY).

-Found my favorite of all time board game online, Barbie Queen of the Prom Game 1990s Edition!! It's ridiculous, and I have no idea why I was so obsessed with it. This board game was played probably every waking chance I got when I was a kid. Anyway, you can buy it here if you are super into it as well (then call me so we can play it together). (Dibs on the hot metallic pink car!!! Ooooo sorry not sorry!)

-Got a few more freelancing jobs! EEE!! So pumped! But also, now my schedule is much more crowded, but I'm not complaining. Just currently trying to find a rhythm that works best for me. So that's why it's been a little all quiet on the blogging front for me. But I have a story this week, and I've got some celebrity makeup looks I want to try as well. So, thank you for sticking around, and I'll be back very soon with some cool stuff. In the mean time, I'm going write my face off and take mini breaks to read this amazing blog I stumbled upon: Garance Dore (you will love it too I promise!).


Talk soon!
xoHM

End O' September and Beginning of October // Random Stuff 001

Well, well, well, end of September. You're looking to be a last minute kinda month, but that's okay with me. I got a bunch of emails for freelancing literally minutes before October 1st, so that was cool and slightly overwhelming. So far these past two days of October have been off to a great start. I have some career updates for ya, plus some various links around the web, and a makeup capsule update.

Also, sorry for the absence this week. I've been super busy with work, freelancing, and some personal shenanigans as well. But I'm back and ready to get this party started!

Career updates:
Landed a solid job mid-month, and these last two days of September have offered up three more pretty solid job opportunities (out of some not so solid ones). I hope they all work out, but I'm counting on at least one to hire me. It's such a numbers game that I don't want to rely on the fact that every company who replies back to me will like my work after a test article. So I'm keeping my hopes kinda low before I get the green light. Might sound pessimistic, but I'm a realist to the core, so don't take this as a negative attitude. Also, I've gotten a couple more emails into October about jobs, but I haven't had time to check them out yet. Fingers crossed these jobs keep rollin' in!

Great read:
This infographic (see below, source HERE) is depressing, but it reminds me of Dorothy Arzner, aka the most successful female director in US film history. She directed 24 films during the golden era of cinema, uncredited for three of those, and had talents in editing, screenwriting, as well as many other film positions. You don't really hear about her in film, which is quite a shame. She invented the first boom microphone (HERE), for crying out loud! Why is this hidden knowledge?!

As the saying goes, a rising tide lifts all boats...remember this ladies. Don't be in competition with one another, rather encourage us all to lift up and rise to the occasion. Even one successful person will launch us all up. We need to remember and follow amazing women so we can all one day be successful too. And so ends my empowering women speak, ha! I could talk about this topic all day every day.

Currently in the news:

This article about a new CA law dealing with sexual assault that just got passed HERE. VERY proud of our governor Jerry Brown as well as our state senator who wrote this new law, Kevin de Leon. I'm hoping that college campuses will take this new law and enforce it to it's fullest, seeing as it's about damn time this law was created. I could talk about this subject forever too, but that's for another day/another post. 

Makeup Capsule weekly wrap-up:

I realized that taking a daily selfie all week long and posting them for you might get kinda boring. So, instead, I'm going to post about one look I try every week, like the Leslie Knope power gaze HERE, using only what I have in my capsule. Sound good? Awesome!

This week's look is a post gym look. I didn't touch anything up, this was taken after a pretty intense workout. I put my makeup on at around 7:30am, and this was taken at about 10pm. The trick to keeping all your makeup (mostly) in place is due to two things:

1. Get quality, long wear makeup. It really does last all day!

2. Don't put on very much. Basically, if you know you have a long day ahead and don't have any time to do a touch up, choose a simple look that doesn't require any babysitting. 

Here's what I'm looking like after my full day:

And my glasses! Ugh, so thick, haha. I very rarely wear these bad boys out in public. But if you wear glasses too, Costco usually has some great deals on frames. (Just don't ask the sales peeps if you look good in your frames, one of them told me they looked terrible on my face. Rude!)

I hope you have a great Thursday, and I'll have a story up here as soon as I get caught up with work!

xoHM

This Week's Wrapup // Leslie Knope's Power Gaze and my The Giggle Guide Article

This week I was terrible at taking photos of my daily makeup looks, sorry!! I started with a few rough days at the beginning of the week, plus a city council meeting yesterday that I had to get all fancy for. And of course I missed out on snapping pics each morning, but I did recreate yesterday's very Leslie Knope style makeup today. Here's what I came up with:

Leslie's power gaze:

My power gaze: (had to take photos in our company's bathroom, which has it's original 1920s wallpaper still...it's very yellow)

With my demon eyes, but no editing whatsoever for these makeup capsule looks! 

Here are two more photos of my look, both with demon less eyes, yay!:

It's soooo weird taking a selfie with closed eyes! 

I think she used more gold eyeshadow that what I did. I went with a pink-ish combo. Here's my version:

Naked2 Palette by Urban Decay, worth the splurge in my opinion.


Kind of similar, right? I love Parks and Rec, so I thought it was only appropriate that I at least try to look like Leslie for a day full of Knope-ish tasks. Unfortunately, I didn't have a power suit to wear, but I still repp'ed the ladies at this all male meeting. I felt pretty good about it!


Some super exciting career news: I got hired this week to write for The Giggle Guide, and I'm very excited about it! My first article was published this week, read it HERE. I might be bouncing up and down with joy right now!! This month has been a lot of hard work but getting another writing gig definitely makes it all worth it. It's one step towards my ultimate career goal, and I'm pretty excited about it! If you are also blazing your own path, please send me an email or comment below with all your achievements this month too. Seriously, list them out and brag away! No matter how small, they are all steps in the right direction. I submitted about 30+ resumes to get one job this month, but one job is worth it. Hopefully this trend continues, fingers crossed.


As far as weekend plans go, the hubs and I have dinner plans Saturday night with some new friends (Paige, the amazing lady behind the blog Healthy Hits The Spot HERE, and her equally cool hubs), then some minor apartment prep work for a walkthrough next week by our landlord (more on that later), and some writing and yoga. Might check out a new church too. All in all, I'm looking forward to the weekend and the month being over, because that means a new budget! I might do some planning for that as well, we'll see how it goes. A book I'm looking at getting is this one HERE, How To Be Parisian Wherever You Are. Sounds like a fun twist on all the typical "being French" books out there. I'll let you know if it's a good read.


xoHM

Story 21 // The Mission

"I still can't make out what they're saying", said Jackie.

She wheeled her chair over to her left computer screen to better see the jumbled code streaming across it. Her chair got stuck a little bit in the dirt--their makeshift tech room was in a shed up in the hills overlooking the main road. The forest wrapped it up almost completely, making it a great hideout. It was abandoned save for a few squirrels that ran through the rotting walls. Jackie pressed her headphones on her ears, in a vain attempt to see if she could understand the dialog better.

"I'm picking up their location now", replied Shannon. She was looking at her radar plus typing away at her computer at the same time, trying to pinpoint the exact location of the convoy. Every so often it would get blurry, so she would have to smack it on it's side, like an old TV set with bunny ear antennas. She was also trying to break into the fire wall the convoy had set up to protect it's intel. It was imperative that she access those top secret documents without being detected. Shannon and Jackie were the best intel-spy-hacker duo on the planet, and they never failed a mission.

Although this mission threatened to break their spotless record. 

Just getting to the location was hell. Half their equipment didn't even get a signal, and their information on the convoy was slim to none. These people were basically ghosts, and Shannon and Jackie were no Ghost Adventurers.

"Wait, I think I'm finally getting a better signal", Jackie said excitedly. She wrote down what she could understand, and handed it to Shannon.

"This is perfect, I think I've almost got the documents, hang on, one more code to enter", said Shannon, her fingers flying fast over her keyboard. The last of the fire wall was breached and she finally saw the huge list of intel. There was a lot of information, more than she prepared for actually. Suddenly the alarm went off on their computer screens--

INTRUDER ALERT!

INTRUDER ALERT!

Red light drenched their screens, and both women looked towards the road to see if the convoy was headed in their direction. Suddenly the door to the shed swung open wildly---

HOW MANY TIMES HAVE I TOLD YOU KIDS TO STOP PLAYING ON MY PROPERTY!?!?! 

A very angry old man who was turing red in the face looked down at the two girls. They had been playing secret spys and constructed their "computers" out of paper. Both froze, their fingers poised over their fake keyboards. They held their breath waiting for the old man to make a move. 

Without thinking the old man grabed a paper monitor and ripped it up, then moved down the line to tear up another one. Shreds of paper went flying, and the two girls sprinted past him towards the open door. They ran as fast as they could into the woods before busting up laughing.

"Did you see his face?! That was hilarious!"

"I can't believe he got so mad!"

They slowed their pace to a walk, and talked about the next mission they wanted to pretend go on.


(This story was inspired by my childhood. I used to make paper computers and play spy all the time, bringing my "supplies" to the school playground. There was a teacher that always shouted at me to stop playing spy and to play on the play set instead. She would grab my paper computer and crumble it up. Kind of dramatic but I understand now that she just wanted me to run around and burn up some kid energy. But it was still fun trying to hide from her and go on a pretend mission.) 

Staying Positive

I usually don't like to admit when I'm wrong. Then again, I don't think anyone likes doing this very much.

But my way of thinking was all wrong. From unmotivated, stagnant, and just downright depressed, I got stuck in a rut. A big ol' rut of self doubt.

This past month though, something happened. I'm not sure if it was the fact that everything in my life kind of fell apart (mainly that my hubs didn't get this huge job opportunity that would of changed our lives forever), or that I finally can laugh at the situation instead of feel like I'm drowning in it. Or maybe I'm going crazy (trust me, I thought this at first). But I just kept on this positive attitude kind of by accident, and while it hasn't been easy, I've felt better about my daily decisions, and I've seen results because of this shift in perspective. So I'm going to jot it all down in hopes someone out there needs a boost too.

Marzee is always in weird positions, cats man.

On fitness:
For the longest time I wanted to be skinny, and I know part of this is my poor body image issue that made me skip meals in high school (I don't do this anymore). But I always think I still need some improvements. I feel pressure to stay thin from everywhere, as I'm sure every other woman does thanks to our terrible culture. I know I've mentioned Tone It Up before, but after joining their online community, I finally feel like my poor body image is solvable. Every single woman on there struggles with it, and there is always someone picking them up to tell them they are perfect the way they already are. So I decided to make this shift at the gym. I got tired of being depressed after not getting in all my cardio, or because I ate too many carbs one day and felt bloated by dinner time. I now want to be as strong as I can be. That means doing more lifting, interval training, and circuits, and less straight cardio. At first I thought I was bound to gain weight (I'm at a healthy 110lbs at 5'2", ps), but to my surprise, I started to see some muscle definition/toning instead. I now look forward to this gym time to push my strength more each day. It seems like such a simple change, and I can't believe it took me this long to do it!

On recalls:
Sometimes GM decides your car is a deathtrap. And sometimes it takes them close to 6 months to ship out replacement parts to your town, making it virtually impossible for you to drive anywhere. But the plus side? I now know the bus route by my place much better, I've saved on gas, and I've realized how much of a privilege it is to have a car in the first place. And I've made new friends with the auto repair shuttle drivers. We may or may not fist bump when we see each other now.

On beauty:
Okay, well I'm still working on this, but I do think the makeup capsule is helping. Last night I found myself much more relaxed than usual. I had hot cocoa, and just sank into my couch, it was such a good feeling! I had just cancelled my Birchbox and Ipsy accounts, and while I thought I'd be bummed, I found that I wasn't. I actually felt relieved. And I think in a really silly way it's due to me putting less stress on makeup. While I like trying new samples, I love that I'm taking a break from it all, and focusing on just the basics of my beauty routine. It's weird, but try doing a makeup capsule too and see if you feel the same way.

On career:
Taking steps towards being an independent/freelance writer has lit a fire under me! I have been so much happier every week knowing I'm trying to further my career goals rather than just plugging away at my daily boring office job. Even though the progress is slow, I'm still pushing forward. I'll write an update on this at the end of each moth if you want to check out my progress.


While this isn't everything, it's a huge part of my shift to a better attitude. I don't always have good days, I've had a couple of really bad ones actually. But for the most part, I'm feeling so much better. I also understand that I'm not dealing with anything major in my life right now, and that sometimes you need to let yourself feel sad/angry/frustrated to get through this event. But if you are just stuck in a rut like me, I hope at least one point in this post helps you.

xo HM

(Pre)Makeup Capsule Photos Fall 2014 // 001

Are you ready for the weekend? I know I am! Here are my week's worth of photos from my (pre)fall 2014 makeup capsule. I'm still fine-tuning my products, there's that crazed feeling before the deadline, kind of like packing for a trip. Will I remember everything? Most importantly though, will I like everything? Fingers crossed I don't go mad! 

These pics are Monday-Thursday, with a few close ups. You can tell the mornings I was sleepy and a little loopy. I didn't take pictures of today bc I was so hungover I looked like a dried prune. It was rough! So I thought you maybe didn't want to see that haphazardness. 

If you want a tutorial on how to do something let me know. So far, I've cut my getting ready/makeup time in half! It's so nice! But I do feel like I'm missing something. I think it's the quickness that makes me feel that way. I'll see if I can pinpoint what's bugging me. 

Weekend plans are to gym it up, do some writing, and focus on my goals. I'm still applying for writing gigs, and I'm going to rewrite my pitch this weekend too. Have a good one and I'll try to check in on Sunday. 

xo HM